the sunlight coming down tattered
around the muntins
making golden quadrilaterals on the tiles
draping over me
like piss on porcelain
a ready-made made ready
for your eyes alone
air coming out of my lungs
from all directions
always fighting to be
the last breath out of this body
i tilt my chest up
just so it won’t hurt so much
i read a book about a murder
she had her heels drilled
so the blood could flow out of her
the killer was a cannibal
girl jerky, he made, girl jerky
and the sound when he tore
her meat off her bones
on these days i lay with my legs dangling
hoping the humors of my conduits
will humor me enough
to make this the last time i hurt
and the liquid running through me
the crackling of my individual nerves
each tendril hissing through gritted teeth
until they tire themselves out
everything simmers
at the end
of a day like that
i read a book about the sun
and how he mends robot girls
if you just learn to ask nicely
he’ll piss his light all over you
as long as you beg and hurt and love
like the robot girl in the book
who saved your life with her own
and rusts away in heaven’s junkyard
Miley Lu | 卢兆东 is a queer Asian-American poet, artist, and drag-performing creature from many places, all of which she calls home. She is an undergraduate at Vassar College. Her work is forthcoming from Empty House Press and Stanchion. Twitter @mileylu_
